Faith is the virtue by which,
clinging-to the faithfulness of God,
we lean upon Him, so that we may
obtain what He gives to us.
- William Ames
The triage note handed to me by this beautiful 18 year old, first time mother-to-be read, “ten months pregnant.” Not a great start. As I began to examine her I first discovered that her blood pressure was elevated. My next finding was that her hands and feet had become swollen with water retention, medically known as edema. An ultra sound done by Dr. Joe disclosed that her placenta was not functioning at its maximum, most likely due to the fact that she was over-due. Most concerning of all was the fact that all of the previous findings contributed to an absence of amniotic fluid, leaving the baby’s umbilical cord vulnerable to being compressed which would cut off the baby's oxygen supply. Adding to the urgency of the situation was the fact that this sweet, young mamma-to-be was having no symptoms of labor.
In this small mountain clinic setting we did not have the medications nor facilities available to us to provide the care our patient so urgently needed. The closest facility that had the capability of meeting her needs was several hours down the mountain. So, we talked to the PUMA leaders to arrange transportation to the district hospital only to find that there were no vehicles available. With heavy hearts and at the peak heat of the day we sent our young patient down the mountain by foot.
As we prayed for safety for this mother and baby I began to feel first helpless and then angry. We came to Nepal to bring people hope and healing. This looked more like abandonment and fear.
“God, what are you doing? Please help us help her, please!”
“Kathi.”
“Yes, Lord.”
“Do you believe I am in control?”
“Well…yes…I do...”
“Then give her to me. She’s not yours, she’s Mine.”
“I know, Lord, but…”
“This is no different than giving me Mark, Jason, Peanut, yourself.”
“I know, Lord, but…”
“Am I sufficient to meet every need?”
“Yes, Lord, You are sufficient.”
We may not know until heaven what God did in that young lady’s life. But I do know that, once again, God was teaching me truths about Himself – about myself - through this. God is faithful and sufficient to meet all our needs. That is and always will be true whether I believe it or not. The crucial and intimately personal issue is this: do I believe Him and if I do, will I live it? When we weed through all the “stuff” I guess that’s the issue for us all.
As we prayed for safety for this mother and baby I began to feel first helpless and then angry. We came to Nepal to bring people hope and healing. This looked more like abandonment and fear.
“God, what are you doing? Please help us help her, please!”
“Kathi.”
“Yes, Lord.”
“Do you believe I am in control?”
“Well…yes…I do...”
“Then give her to me. She’s not yours, she’s Mine.”
“I know, Lord, but…”
“This is no different than giving me Mark, Jason, Peanut, yourself.”
“I know, Lord, but…”
“Am I sufficient to meet every need?”
“Yes, Lord, You are sufficient.”
We may not know until heaven what God did in that young lady’s life. But I do know that, once again, God was teaching me truths about Himself – about myself - through this. God is faithful and sufficient to meet all our needs. That is and always will be true whether I believe it or not. The crucial and intimately personal issue is this: do I believe Him and if I do, will I live it? When we weed through all the “stuff” I guess that’s the issue for us all.
2 comments:
Hi Kathi -
What a heart-wrenching story! Thank you for sending me the link to your blog.
Blessings,
Susan
Susan,
Thank you for your support. I think I feel the way the priests must have felt when they gingerly put their big toes in the water!
God bless you,
Kathi
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